B is for Banding Together: #atozchallenge Day 2


Apart to Soar

Banding together

Banding with one apart

Apart from all that we are

Apart as we go forth as three

Three alone without our fourth

Three drawn into one fractured whole

Whole in the bonds of friendship

Whole in the reality of our family

Family splintered at its heart

Family rent and broken in its soul

Soul taken from us against our will

Soul departed too soon and too far

Far from the days when we all lived

Far from that day when we all laughed

Laughed until our faces ached

Laughed until joyful tears flowed

Flowed with our lovely chaotic joy

Flowed from us into little girl and boy

Boy grown now into something not-boy

Boy who carries himself like a man

Man grown from all that we lost

Man who is the proof of all that remains

Remains of the father continue in his son

Remains sweet gentle silly wise and kind

Kind to his mother the grieving wife

Kind to a sister who lost father and friend

Friend who was the gifter of Hess trucks

Fishing buddy and giver of daring genes

Genes she wears boldly even now

Genes that bring her a fiery strength

Strength we all need now in our sorrow

Strength like that which connects

Connects them to each other and to me

Connects us all to the one we mourn

Mourn for the spirit that’s faded away

Mourn for many an emptier tomorrow

Tomorrow will dawn still and we’ll be here

Tomorrow we’ll still have one another

Another chance to be here with our grief

Another day to treasure the memories

Memories of moments tiny and huge

Memories that tear and those that heal

Heal the gaping void he left behind

Heal with the love he lavished and shared

Shared pain is better than that borne alone

Shared joys swell and grow and soar

Soar to a place perhaps where he remains

Soar and lift us all to a place of peace



I’m running a day late with my B post…I’m very much winging it as I find my way back to a regular blogging routine after the traumatic season of Jim’s illness and death, which followed a season of intense activity as we worked together to build his hot sauce business…

I’m also diving back into other things, like building my writing career, and, to that end, I spent a chunk of yesterday afternoon in an online master class for author platform building. It kind of threw me off my planned schedule, but I’m not sorry, because I learned a tremendous amount, and renewed my commitment to myself and my craft. Those are worth a bit of a kink in my posting…

But that’s not really what I wanted to talk about today.

As I explore the Alphabet of Grief, I am profoundly grateful for the deep connection our family shared. Jim’s death tore a gaping hole in the fabric of our lives – as individuals, and as a unit. But the close bonds we share have allowed us to band together. The kids and I together, each of them and me, and the two of them as siblings facing the loss of their dad.

Without these bonds, I don’t think we’d be nearly as okay as we are. Without the bonds we all shared with Jim – who was my best friend and Accomplice in life; who was Miah’s male role model and TV buddy; and who was wrapped around the finger of a daughter who inherited his love of the adrenaline rush of risk-taking – I know we would be poorer.

I’ve tried to capture the nature of our loss, and what we have left to build upon, in this blitz poem.

I’ll leave you with an image of us all, together, laughing in lovely chaos. This was our life, and is the foundation of what we are.

Come back tomorrow, when we’ll explore what Cancer Consumes – and what it can’t devour.

You can find other beautiful B posts here!


  1. Banding together is the best way to get through difficult times. Glad you have the three of you, as difficult as it is.

    Jayden R. Vincente
    Erotic Fiction Writer

Take a chance! Type something in this box, and see what happens! =D

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.