SoCS : “Shape of My Heart”


This post is part of Linda G.Hill’s Stream of Consciousness Saturday meme.

The idea is simple – post an unedited stream of consciousness piece that ties into the weekly prompt – this week’s is to write a post that uses the word or theme: shape.

I thought immediately of this song, so I looked up the video, and then the story was born..

Shape of My Heart…

Disclaimer: T’Pol, Trip, and all the rest of Star Trek are property of CBS/Paramount; no copyright infringement intended. I just want to play with them, and I’m careful!

Trip Tucker heard the music before the hatch had slipped open enough to poke his head through – sweet, swelling notes, bouncing of the tubelike walls of Travis’s Sweet Spot. He thought of closing the hatch, but whoever was up there had to have seen it moving, and he figured it would be pretty rude to leave without announcing himself…

T’Pol was sitting, cross-legged and straight-backed, upside-down on the ceiling, watching him.

He wasn’t sure who he’d expected – but he knew it wasn’t her. He wasn’t sure where he stood with her, really – he was the only one on the ship who knew how close they’d come to losing her a few days ago – but he only knew because he’d poked his nose into her personal affairs…affairs, arranged marriage…

As if trying to figure out how to deal with the gorgeous Vulcan wasn’t hard enough without all that.

She was still watching him. Waiting. Why the hell did she always remind him of a hunting cat when she did that? “Want company?” he asked, not sure if she could hear him over the music.

As though reading his mind – good Lord, she couldn’t, could she? – T’Pol touched the datapad she held and the music cut off mid-note in a way that made him cringe a little. He never liked to turn off a song or a movie in the middle. “Please join me, if you wish.”

The ball’s in my court, then…Trip’s heart gave a ridiculous little throb as it sped up at the thought of sharing this small space with her- and he pushed off into the null-grav tube and aimed himself at the space next to her. Once he was settled, he looked at the pad she held. “You didn’t have to turn it off. What’re you listening to? It sounds familiar.”

“It is a selection from your gift,” she answered. “According to your notes, the performer is named simply Sting, and the song, although titled “Shape of My Heart”, seems to have nothing to do with anatomy, but rather with art, games, meditation, and mathematics.” She got that adorable little wrinkle in her forehead that said she was trying to work her way around to the real point.

“I think I remember that one – but I haven’t heard it in a long time. Mind starting over, so I can catch up?” Trip smiled at her, and a whiff of her citrus-and-sandalwood perfume hit him full force, reminding him of that damned Suliban cell and the way she’d been – would he ever get the chance to see where that could lead?

T’Pol said nothing, only touched the screen, which came back to life. Now that he heard the first few notes, he knew the song, and the video – he’d really liked this one in his early twenties- so he watched T’Pol watch the screen. She remained perfectly still and straight, but she got that look in her eyes again, and her face opened up, quick flashes of tiny muscle movements saying that she was feeling something intense, something she’d said she only felt with human music.

The song unfurled to a sweet ending – and then Sting snorted and laughed, the drummer lobbed off some random notes, and everyone guffawed.

“Why did they laugh? Is the song intended to be humorous?”

“I don’t know why – but it’s not a funny song. Maybe they just needed to vent a little after they played. Maybe they were laughing at a joke someone told that morning. “

“Human emotional responses are often erratic and ambiguous. I don’t understand them.”

“Wanna know a secret? Most of the time, neither do we. But maybe it would be better to explore what you feel when you listen.”

“He speaks of geometry, meditation, and probable outcomes. These are quantifiable terms, and suggest a logical mind and a level of self-awareness. And yet he speaks of luck and chance and the shape of his heart, as though those things are also logical and quantifiable. I feel that I’m intended to understand the message to be conveyed, but I don’t.” She regarded him with those almond shaped hazel eyes, and Trip knew she was looking for answers she could define – and that she expected him to provide them.

“Humans don’t necessarily make music to pass along a message, T’Pol – or at least, not like that. He might have been sharing a daydream, or telling a story, or just trying to evoke a mood. A lot of Sting’s music is like poetry – mood, imagery, deep thought, symbolism. I think he meant for everyone to take from it whatever they did – he was offering something from inside of him.”

“The ‘shape of his heart?’ ” T’Pol said, in that husky way she had when she was unsure of herself.

“I guess so.”

“Then – the ‘shape of my heart’ is what is contained within me -beneath logic and language?” Her scent was getting stronger, and her pupils were huge and dark, and Trip swallowed as she lifted paired fingers that quivered the tiniest bit- damn…

He could only watch as her fingers came for his; he knew what was coming, and he wanted it, was terrified of it…

And still, he lifted his fingers to meet hers, and, as her other hand began the song again, he felt the touch, and they melted together into a sharing that was reshaping his human heart to better suit hers…

Want more of these two?

Enjoy stream-of consciousness writing? Anyone can play, so long as they are willing to follow a few simple rules. See you next week, for another live-streaming look into the lovely chaos in my mind! =)

Join in or read more SoCS posts here!


    • I know! These two are just so darned cute and good together, that I can’t get enough. They went and canceled the series before I ever saw it, so I have to make my own TnT stories.

      Because that’s a real hardship for me, as I’m sure you can tell! =D

      • indeed. I have never watched that one very much. Don’t know why even though I thought it is one of the better Star Trek series. They are not showing them on telly here not any of them as far as I know but I am not watching telly a lot anyway. You take care Bee

        • I don’t think they’re on television here, anymore, either – at least, they aren’t on our el cheapo basic basic cable. I watch them on Netflix or Amazon Prime, but I know those aren’t options fro you. But also has it.

          I didn’t watch it when it came out, for several reasons. First, I had a three week old. Second, it was shortly after the 9/11 attacks, and things here were volatile. Third, we were planning a cross-country drive from Montana to New York – with a nursling newborn, which was madness of high magnitude. Fourth, I couldn’t see that goofy dude from Quantum Leap as a starship captain (I was wrong; now he’s on a new show, NCIS: New Orleans, as an investigator, and I’m starting to love that show). And fifth, and most importantly, it looked like they plopped in a token Vulcan, only this time they made her a sexy woman, instead, which Just. Wouldn’t. Work.

          About that, I was delightfully, completely, wonderfully WRONG! And I admit it.

          I’m pretty much watching it on a loop; not everyday (because my Accomplice would go nuts), but, once I finish, I go back again…

          And then I write stories for TnT…because they need more stories! =)

          • they certainly do ~ you go girl! Ah the goofy dude from quantum leap yes he gave me the creeps at first. And now he is on NCIS? In New Orleans? I think I have to watch more telly 🙂

          • Yes, he is. It’s brand-new though (like 4 episodes in), so it might not be accessible to you yet. He doesn’t have a beagle, now, but he plays jazz piano and cooks his own gumbo…

            I’ve never watched NCIS before, so it’s all pretty new to me. Mark Harmon has come on for guest roles.

          • I used to watch the original NCIS which I really loved but I have grown out of the whole CIS a little bit. Have discovered Gotham though this week 🙂

          • There have been so many legend’fairy tale/superhero shows here the last few years that I’ve stopped watching them…

            Over the summer, though, there as a very neat little reality show where people who loved fantasy got to compete in movie-quality fantasy cosplay challenges. I didn’t remember to watch it every week, but I saw it a few times and hope it’s back next summer. I think it was called The Quest.

            I’ve discovered The Amazing Race this year, too. I like the little bits of insight into other places and cultures, and i enjoy watching the dynamics within each team and between teams.

    • It’s easy to do with Trip and T’Pol. I was skeptical when I first started watching, but by episode 7, I was totally on board. Incidentally, that episode, “Breaking the Ice” is the one this little story is connected to. I forgot to mention it in the post.

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